Looking for Fresh Air

Air
Spring fresh
From a can
Fooling no one
Wind

This is a Lanturne – a 5 line poem with a a strict syllable count (1-2-3-4-1) where the last line is a synonym or near synonym of the first line. This uses the Looking Foolish Scavenger Hunt prompt #7 – air.

Living with 3 males I had to resort to various air fresheners out of a sense of self preservation. I installed solid air fresheners in their bedrooms, spray air fresheners in the bathrooms, and I bought Febreeze by the gallon. It was futile. When they would use the bathroom, on reflex I’d shout “FLUSH!” as soon as I heard the door close. It never seemed to work. The green toxic fumes would seep under the door and invade the rest of the house. Kurt Vonnegut, being a male, had the standard attitude toward “passing gas”, “dropping a cookie”, “crop dusting”, “cutting the cheese” or any other euphemism for flatulence. I quote, “And people still laugh about as much as they ever did, despite their shrunken brains. If a bunch of them are lying around on a beach, and one of them farts, everybody else laughs and laughs, just as people would have done a million years ago.” – Galápagos For those not familiar with this book, I recommend you check it out of the library and give it a read. It is about human evolution. A disease forces people to abandon land and basically become seals. Yes, anytime one of the guys lets one rip, they all pause and then laugh. If a woman lets one escape it is cause for complete mortification and profuse apologies. No one thinks it is funny. And on the whole I’m fairly certain the feminine version is lesser in quantity and decibel rating and definitely less toxic. So why are girl farts not funny but the stuff that could be used as a chemical warfare agent is a laugh riot? Go figure…