Looking for My Groove

I had my appointment with my Wellness Coach last week. She is a down to earth woman with a warm heart. She is easy to talk to. Her purpose is to hold me accountable as I work to achieve my fitness goals. Currently my goals are to increase my physical activity (thus the Fitbit™ to track exercise and steps), maintain my weight (I record everything I eat in myfitnesspal), and to reduce my stress levels (daily meditations and better sleep habits).

As soon as I find a groove some event occurs that levers me out of said groove. Case in point: During Lent and right up to Easter I was reading a wonderful daily devotional. It had everything I wanted and sometimes needed – scripture, meditation, and a call to action. I actually went through it twice. Since then I’ve been looking for a replacement to no avail. In fact some of the materials I’ve found have been so inappropriate that I’ve had to ditch them. I signed up for one online meditation that turned out to be geared specifically for men – so much so that I didn’t relate to it at all! Another one ended up being anti-Catholic so I didn’t finish that one either. It is starting to stress me out. It would be easier to just forget about it. (I’m not a quitter.)

Sinking to my knees
Quicksand seeps into my shoes
I grab at the rope

Then there is the issue of sleep. I have been going to bed and sleeping like the dead. But I’ve had to get up earlier than usual and I’ve been going to bed later than usual. All that means I’m getting on average 5.5 hours of sleep a night. To function at maximum capacity I need a solid 6.5 hours with at least 1 hour of deep sleep. It wasn’t happening. Now that I’m on vacation I’m resetting the sleep cycle. I’m hoping I can get that groove back!

Quicksand shines at night
Stand still to slow the sinking
Search the dark for help

Now that the weather is really starting to warm up, I need to get outside for more physical activity. I’ve met my fitness goals easily the last couple of weeks (exercising indoors at home) and if possible I’d like to exceed them (at least while on vacation). The current goal is to have 30 minutes of fat burning activity daily. This means I need to get my heart rate above 100 beats per minute (bpm). However that is more easily said than done. My resting heart rate is hovering at 60 bpm. When I’m walking it shoots up to about 85 – 90 bpm. To get it to over 100 I have to do extraordinary things – scream while I walk, or wave my arms like a windmill or punch the air, or even march and pretend to be Godzilla stomping on villages. In short I have to do things that would make people conclude that I’m a lunatic. Which is why I’ve been walking within the confines of my home.

Call for assistance
Swim for the edge in quicksand
Slowly sink deeper

This is a Haibun which is a Japanese form which incorporates prose and Haiku. The idea is to use the Haiku to create a subtle relationship with the prose where things are not stated directly but rather through allusion and metaphor resulting in ambiguity to encourage the reader’s imagination. The prose can be on any topic but traditionally are about travel.

6 thoughts on “Looking for My Groove

  1. Glad you can work on your fitness. What happens when you aren’t able to physically walk even? I struggle with the pool as I come home from that in pain too. Now my fitness is drag a hose to bird baths. 🙂

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