Today I am going on a retreat for work. It is sort of mandatory. The “invitation” suggested the following:
1. Get there early since parking is limited.
2. Carpool if at all possible (see above).
3. Bring a water bottle or coffee mug to reduce the amount of paper waste generated.
4. Wear comfortable casual clothes because:
A. We will be “playing games”
B. You can go for a walk at lunch
C. There will be “learning activities” which may involve sitting on the floor
5. There will be a light breakfast if you get there before 8:00 AM
6. They will provide lunch, beverages, and snacks.
7. You need to bring an “open mind” and a “spirit of cooperation”.
8. The retreat will conclude by 5:00 PM.
I am not so sure I am going to enjoy this retreat. I have pried the door open on my mind and have wedged some serious reservations into the door jam to keep it open. If they serve salads for lunch my “spirit of cooperation” just might dive into the open mind door and kick it closed from the inside. Just saying. I like vegetables but I want them cooked. I am not a rawist. I am closer to an obligate carnivore than most. In fact I don’t think I’ve met a meat I didn’t like. I am going to carpool with a coworker thus we are meeting at 7:30 AM and hopefully make it to the retreat (the Boat House) in time for breakfast and to score a parking spot! The rest of the day will be what it is. I’m hopping against all odds that it is a painless event…
A Different Perspective 
Enjoy your open mind. I’m sure we will enjoy reading about them later.
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I survived – and was able to retrieve my cushion from the car so my tailbone didn’t get bruised!
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Maybe lunch will be peanut butter and jelly sandwiches served with chips. rotfl. At least you go with open mind.
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Nope. Lunch was salad and choice of sandwiches all with nasty stuff on them (tomato, lettuce, pickles, and some sort of mayo/thousand island dressing barf). I was able to fill up on the nutritious oatmeal cookie, Swedish fish, and the yogurt left over from breakfast. I brought Sparky home a couple sandwiches and a huge salad. He was happy.
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Sounds like the day from h-ll. Hope you survive.
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I survived, avoided the games (corn hole, giant jenga, and ladder toss), and actually learned a couple things. Other than the killer folding chairs and the frou-frou salad lunch, it wasn’t as bad as I had anticipated.
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They should NEVER plan “learning activities” for adults that involve sitting on the floor. What did they do, hire kindergarten teachers to run this?
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On the bright side, if they’re going to treat you like five-year-olds, maybe there will be a nap time.
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*smile* What makes you think there wasn’t? The after lunch speaker put several people to sleep. I was entertained by watching 2 at the table I was facing across the room… At least they didn’t snore or fall out of their chairs.
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Ha! No it was HR folks. But I didn’t have to sit on the floor. They didn’t have time for that particular “exercise” so we all escaped!
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I hope it’s a better day than you anticipate!
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It was – sort of. At least I didn’t have to sit on the floor but I’m wondering if the floor would have been more comfortable than the plastic folding chairs.
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I hope you had a good time..Looking forward to hearing about it. Hugs
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I wouldn’t characterize it as a good time however it wasn’t as awful as anticipated!
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Often the things we dread the most turn out to be not so bad after all. I really hope this is one of those times!
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It was not horrible but the lunch was mostly salad… The bad part was assigned seating and especially mine – I was placed strategically so that I could be pumped for information.
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I imagine the salad had either cheese or egg in it. “Bonding” games can be fun. I would have scheduled a physical activity for after lunch. Listening to anyone in the afternoon, especially in the heat, is an exercise in futility. I know a supervisor who wrote letters of reprimand for people who fell asleep during afternoon presentations. He was fired at the end of the year.
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The salad was without cheese and there wasn’t any egg to be found. It did however have really big croutons and lots of fresh tomato. It looked pretty but I declined the salad. The bonding was more uncomfortable than anything else. I did meet some nice people but there was plenty of snoozing right after lunch. I’m hoping the VP for Research wasn’t taking names (although I wasn’t one of the nodders)!
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Oh, yikes, that would not be my idea of a fun time. I’m glad I work in a small office where no such things as work retreats exist. I’d rather do a retreat of my own making! I’m not good with sitting on the floor either. But I am fond of salads ;-). peace & smiles
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You would have loved the lunch! The consensus from those who had participated in the past was that this was an improvement over the previous formats. I’m sensing that there is lots of room for improvements!
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Sounds like a “faculty” day at university.
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Hehe! Yeah, sort of – we were all learning the new performance evaluation process (everyone from mere exempt supervisors to Faculty and even some Vice Presidents). Because there were some big wigs present the food was top notch.
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