Looking at the Shameless

There must be something in the air. It has affected some people in a very negative way. Both Sparky and I had disturbing encounters. My encounter was at the grocery store. A mother and her son decided to escalate a disagreement right in the middle of the produce section. All I wanted to do was get some carrots and bananas. Instead I had to wait until it was safe to approach the banana display. The mother was elderly and in an electric scooter. Her son was in his mid to late 50s I’m guessing. They were having an argument that included calling each other vile names. The son at one point accused his mother of favoring his brother to which the mother responded that when he was acting like an @$$ X*!# it was easy to love his brother more! Anyway they nearly came to blows but the store management arrived and asked them to either stop the altercation or leave the store. The result was an uneasy truce and they moved away from the produce section.

Sparky meanwhile was at work dealing with a different mother-son pair. Seems they needed his assistance to print some comments made on the son’s Facebook page. According to Sparky, “She was all up in his business and continually contradicted every statement he made.” Seems he was being bullied at school and needed to print the evidence. From Sparky’s perspective it looked like he was bullied at home too! He wished the mother would’ve back off and let him help her son but that didn’t happen. He made the best of it but was very uncomfortable.

And all this happened in full view of the public. I suppose it is an extension of living in glass houses where our whole lives are on display via social media. Or it could be a lack of boundaries that are either not posted or continually overstepped. Maybe some folks just don’t care how society perceives them. I am all for owning your own quirks. The idea that the opinions of others shouldn’t determine your self worth is one I embrace. But there is a component of social responsibility that should be integral to all actions, interactions and reactions that are in the public scope. Namely we must respect others and their right to move about public spaces with a sense of security, without fear for their personal welfare, and with the remembrance that our words and actions should have a minimum decorum to avoid shocking or harming others.

If someone treats their flesh and blood with total disrespect, I can’t imagine how they would treat non-family members!

Looking at Marriage

Gather the loose threads
Hold them tight and resist
The urge to pull and thus unravel
The edges of me
Rub magazine inserts on pulse points
As if the scent will act like soap
Securing my shadow soul to this body
My blurred outline
Dissipates in Alka-Seltzer fizz
Wondering as I grow smaller
Where I end and you begin

The announcement of an engagement is always exciting. The wedding is a joyous event. The preparations for the “big day” seem to be all consuming for many couples. The more important aspect is learning to trust each other. There is no greater act of trust than to lay down next to another and sleep. When we sleep we are at our most vulnerable. We have made formal vows which are far more than a mere promise. In marriage we are joined and become one. That is a huge step. It means that what happens to me happens to him. The joining of two lives results in giving up being self-centered. The act of trusting another person with your dreams, secrets, and future means that you must take care of them and they you. There is a point when you don’t think in terms of “me” but only “we”. This trust in marriage is only one iteration of trusting. To have marriage work you should have created a foundation of trust with God. That seems an odd statement to many because they have never trusted anyone or anything beyond themselves. We are assured that God loves and care for us. We may not get our way or have prayers answered in our time frame but that does not diminish the love God has for us. It is the trust we place in a spouse that when broken is the most devastating. I am wondering if the seemingly disposable marriages are a result of not having any experience with trust…

Looking to Stick It To the Man

I love a deal. I like to save money. My husband doesn’t worry when I go out shopping because he knows I’m frugal and thrifty and make every penny count. So I was very pleased with myself after doing a little Christmas shopping. Because you can’t be too careful I’m not posting any photos of my purchases. Suffice to say I made out like a bandit. So here is the scoop – I spent $12.71 but my total savings was $66.35! No, not at Kohl’s. I was at Meijers…

I have completed the shopping for my sister, my mother, and for a work friend! And all it cost was $5.60. Now if I hadn’t gotten such a great bargain I would have spent $56.00!! I’m feeling pretty proud of myself. My usual goal is to get all the Christmas shopping completed by Halloween but this year I’m going cut myself some slack and have it done before Thanksgiving. Sure the Black Friday sales will happen but I’m not willing to get up in the middle of the night. Nor stand in line for 5 hours so that I can elbow my way into a store only to discover they only had 3 of the advertised items and I was the 8th person through the doors. Not worth it! The only people left to buy for are my sons. I need to get the elf gifts. I’ll probably purchase some delicacies like taro mochi, adobo cracker nuts, dried mango, and maybe some smoked fishes…

How do you “stick it to the man”? Have you started your gift shopping?