I apologize in advance for the cryptic nature of this post. It is important to me to share and yet it is equally important to preserve the privacy of individuals. With that disclaimer, I leave it to you to ‘read between the lines’ and decipher as you can.
Hurt and pain can come at anytime and from any direction. For the empathetic, it is the same whether it is their own or that of someone they love – they feel deeply. When the whole of their world is in agony, only the strongest can withstand the battering.
Being strong is not being able to stand immovable. Mountains appear strong but they are being eroded by wind and water. I see strength as the wind. It moves or is moved yet no knife cuts to its heart. Hurl arrows and they are slowed and finally fall unable to reach their mark. It slides effortlessly around the world. It parts for obstacles yet leaves its mark.
They say to go with the flow. There are some who visualize the flow of time, the Qi, or tides. It is always more work to go against the flow. Going with the flow relieves you of decision-making, responsibility, even the need to make an effort. There comes a time when you have to choose a path. Some are much more difficult than others. If you jump into the ocean, you have to know that you must either swim against the tide to reach land, go with the flow which will leave you open to the whims of your surroundings, or sink to the bottom. Life is choices – choose wisely.
Just so you know, everyone is afraid. The fearless still have that seed of fear waiting to spring into full flower. Some are so afraid that they cower from their own shadow. Some folks walk around whistling a happy tune so that no one will know they are afraid. Others challenge their fears. They do deeds of daring – base jumping, skydiving, running triathlons, pushing their minds and bodies to the limit and pushing fear away. But the fear is always there and they continue to push until it finally pushes back. And they face the biggest fear of all – death.
My advice – shed a tear for those hurting, and cry when you are hurt. The tears will wash you clean. Then rise up and be the wind and go where you will. Jump in and swim against the current. Become a friend to fear and let it be the voice of reason as you dance and spin. Take it with you on your journey….
And that’s all I have to say about that.
As a natural contrarian, going against the flow seems normal – especially in my professional days. Therefore, the times of going with the flow is a bit of a respit. On the other hand, thanks for your powerful closing paragraph.
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Thanks Frank! I have several contrarians in the family – they tend to make life interesting! Glad the last paragraph spoke to you!
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I guess I manage fear in all of those ways, depending on the level of threat perceived. Interesting post!
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Thanks Dodi. Fear has been a constant and not altogether unwelcome companion on life’s travels…
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This is such a beautiful write, Muri. Thank you.
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Thanks David! It is necessary at times for me to write to a specific audience without being blatant. I hope they think it beautiful or at least helpful….
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Beautifully written, and needed. ((hugs))
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Thanks Ruth! If you benefited then I’m pleased! I just hope the ones this was written for can use this post to help them move forward…
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A behavioral philosophical entry. Very interesting, Val. I wonder what could have motivated this theme?
Love ❤
Michel
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Thanks Michel. This was written because I have friends/family members who are being bullied, searching for their place in the world and within themselves and are fearful of decisions that they must make…
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frightening !
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Yes it is never easy to step out of your comfort zone….
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A good write Val.
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Thank-you Di. Sometimes you need to tell someone(s) the truth and console them too…
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Tears can be cleansing.
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Yes the best emotional cleaner there is!
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Yes. I usually feel much better after.
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Emotionally cleansed is a fresh start….
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Yes.
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🙂
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Such a beautiful share, Val. I am sure for whomsoever this was written, has benefited from this. ❤️
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I hope so!! Glad you thought it beautiful!
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Fearless people don’t need courage. This is a very lovely post, Val. ❤
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Thanks Martha! They say courage is doing the thing even with fear riding on your back… ❤
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Hemingway defined courage as “grace under pressure.”
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That sounds about right but Hemingway is not my favorite person/author. But that’s my problem….
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I admire that you can identify feelings so clearly. I find that difficult. But you are right, no choice is still a choice. (K)
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I can identify but dealing with them is a whole different matter. I’m good but there are times when others need a life rope…
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Too often. I’m better at helping others. Myself, not so much.
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I think that society puts guilt trips on women who search for balance instead of constantly being the givers.
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I agree.
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🙂
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I guess it’s who can manage the tough seas of life. You cry into an ocean, but the ocean has many other tears. Just try to keep your head above water.
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Thanks Kaela but I’m fine it is others I’m writing to. I have several family members struggling with identity, bullying, decisions that will shape their lives in ways they do not understand or anticipate.
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No idea who/what this post is about, but sending hugs and courage to face the situation bravely. I agree about the tears. That’s why shrinks always have tissues at the ready. Holding it in is far more damaging than letting it out.
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Thanks Joan! The people in my life who this is for need all the prayers they can get! I’m with Shrek, “Better out than in.”
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That’s very well said Val. So many Bullies feed on fear and sometimes you just need to find that small slither of hope and strength
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Thanks Mimu. The persons this was for are having many problems that require bravery. They are always surrounded by friends and family to remind them that there is hope and love…
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I’m glad they have you! I send strength from my side 💪
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Thanks Mimu! There are so many problems that I’ve never had to face that many of the younger members of the family have had to deal with…
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I understand. It’s really a generation gap issue. With time our issues have evolved dramatically. It’s more bugging because it’s about mental health and so much more difficult to solve
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Not just mental health but the pressure to stay current with the technology! Everything is moving very fast and it is a struggle to balance needs for self care and still stay in front of the curve…
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That’s very true!
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🙂
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Lovely post. Yes, we all have fears, no matter how we present ourselves to others.
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I think fear is a healthy feeling that can keep us from doing stupid stuff.
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Excellent way to look at life and fear. I think we can all relate, especially as we begin to age.
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Thanks Valerie! I just hope the individuals this was aimed at can be brave and make the most of life.
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Acceptance and perseverance are very important behaviors to embrace when struggling. I hope you are ok, Val?
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Yes Susi. I’m fine (other than COVID). This was written to bolster a couple family members and friend who are facing tough times…
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Ah, I hope they can go through it without too much pain.
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Me too. Sometimes life is difficult, sometimes our choices make it more so. I’m hoping they make choices that are best for each of them.
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((hugs)) for you all!
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Thanks Susi. I went through the usual teen angst but the level among today’s teens is off the scale and the job market is screaming for workers but all the jobs are part-time with no benefits…
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Yeah, I can’t imagine what it would be like in today’s market. I’m at the total opposite end of the “work experience.”
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Me too. But as I enjoy retirement, I see that others will never have the luxury of retiring from an employer after 28 years… That sense of stability is long gone. Then they have their own personal demons to wrestle with on top of everything else.
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Yeah, I see it too. I especially worry for my kids but thankfully, they are level-headed and understand the challenges of life, as well as how to prepare for them.
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Some children are able to face challenges with more equanimity than others. The people I wrote this for are filled with self doubt and fear… I hope they listen and realize they are not alone and the challenges are not insurmountable.
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I hope so too.
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❤
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So very well-stated! My acknowledgement of Fear is to plan ahead for those things that Fear tells me could go sideways, or way down south, if I follow caprice.
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Yes, Gary. Fear does allow for contingency plans – just in case. And as fear tends to do – warn us off from folly!
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